Post by Friday on Jan 22, 2014 15:40:09 GMT -5
My dearest friends,
I have been a bad friend. But, I apologize for my delay in my reply. I've been working every day and with my computer being physically compromised I try to stay off of it so I don't damage it to the point I lose my screen. (long story short the casing around my screen has split meaning the only thing holding my screen to the bottom half of my computer is all the cords between the two, hence, I've limited it's use). I'm also going to extend an apology to Meghan, who I know is dying to be a part of this conversation. Hang in there! It'll happen!
To get straight to the business of things.... Orgasms are hard.
And to be bluntly honest, until I was with Q I didn't really know what good sex was, and what it can be. I don't orgasm every time, and there are times when he doesn't orgasm (although that is very very rare). And it's a joke between us, but when it comes down to it, I use him to get off. We move at different paces when it comes down to it. The rhythm that works for him just doesn't do it for me. And like Kailtin said, clitoral stimulation is a big thing. Don't be afraid to help things along. Play with yourself, or ask him to! In my experience they think it's hot, it shows that you're getting into it. Being on top is a great way to do that, or having him behind you. (Now that I'm thinking about it, I don't know that I've ever had an orgasm in just missionary). So it all boils down to tip number 1.) Don't be afraid to help yourself!
Another thing, don't be afraid to try different positions and change things up, not just individual times you have sex but during the same session. Especially later in the relationship it's important to try new things, sexual and otherwise. But trying new positions will help you find what works for you. There are sooo many different positions you can fit two people in, of which I had no idea until Q put me into them, but it's fun, and more often then not, experimenting will let you find what you enjoy the most. Missionary, on top, him behind you, standing, sitting on a counter, bent over the couch arm, reverse cowgirl, the list goes on. And on the note of oral sex, it doesn't have to be the main event! Mix it in there. I personally love being on the receiving end, if they're doing it right, which works out because Q loves being down there, more power to him I say. But he knows I'm not a fan of giving it, so when it does happen I'm never down there long. Keeps jaws from aching and me just being put completely out of the mood. But, back to topic, tip 2.) Use different positions to your advantage.
Probably the most important thing I can say is that you just have to communicate with your partner. Be open about your problems, and be honest. Even if you don't have an orgasm, you can still explain that you've enjoyed it (if you actually did). Just because you don't orgasm doesn't mean it didn't feel good, and that's something that I don't think men in general realize. Tell them what you're uncomfortable with, and tell them what you like. They seem like little things, but they go a long way in making sex better in the long run.
So I leave you with this, and am always available for more advice should it arise that it is needed. I sadly must go to work now, because having money to eat is important. I hope you all have a lovely day, and, I hope this helped!
Love,
Kaylie
P.S. I need your address Becca, I have a Christmas present to send!
I have been a bad friend. But, I apologize for my delay in my reply. I've been working every day and with my computer being physically compromised I try to stay off of it so I don't damage it to the point I lose my screen. (long story short the casing around my screen has split meaning the only thing holding my screen to the bottom half of my computer is all the cords between the two, hence, I've limited it's use). I'm also going to extend an apology to Meghan, who I know is dying to be a part of this conversation. Hang in there! It'll happen!
To get straight to the business of things.... Orgasms are hard.
And to be bluntly honest, until I was with Q I didn't really know what good sex was, and what it can be. I don't orgasm every time, and there are times when he doesn't orgasm (although that is very very rare). And it's a joke between us, but when it comes down to it, I use him to get off. We move at different paces when it comes down to it. The rhythm that works for him just doesn't do it for me. And like Kailtin said, clitoral stimulation is a big thing. Don't be afraid to help things along. Play with yourself, or ask him to! In my experience they think it's hot, it shows that you're getting into it. Being on top is a great way to do that, or having him behind you. (Now that I'm thinking about it, I don't know that I've ever had an orgasm in just missionary). So it all boils down to tip number 1.) Don't be afraid to help yourself!
Another thing, don't be afraid to try different positions and change things up, not just individual times you have sex but during the same session. Especially later in the relationship it's important to try new things, sexual and otherwise. But trying new positions will help you find what works for you. There are sooo many different positions you can fit two people in, of which I had no idea until Q put me into them, but it's fun, and more often then not, experimenting will let you find what you enjoy the most. Missionary, on top, him behind you, standing, sitting on a counter, bent over the couch arm, reverse cowgirl, the list goes on. And on the note of oral sex, it doesn't have to be the main event! Mix it in there. I personally love being on the receiving end, if they're doing it right, which works out because Q loves being down there, more power to him I say. But he knows I'm not a fan of giving it, so when it does happen I'm never down there long. Keeps jaws from aching and me just being put completely out of the mood. But, back to topic, tip 2.) Use different positions to your advantage.
Probably the most important thing I can say is that you just have to communicate with your partner. Be open about your problems, and be honest. Even if you don't have an orgasm, you can still explain that you've enjoyed it (if you actually did). Just because you don't orgasm doesn't mean it didn't feel good, and that's something that I don't think men in general realize. Tell them what you're uncomfortable with, and tell them what you like. They seem like little things, but they go a long way in making sex better in the long run.
So I leave you with this, and am always available for more advice should it arise that it is needed. I sadly must go to work now, because having money to eat is important. I hope you all have a lovely day, and, I hope this helped!
Love,
Kaylie
P.S. I need your address Becca, I have a Christmas present to send!